It is interesting to me that the Holy Ghost does not sleep. And He seems to visit me during the middle of the night. The things that I do not listen to, the things that He needs to tell me I don't seem to listen to during the day, thus He comes and talks to me during the middle of the night.
Perhaps it is because my mind is too busy listening to other voices. Perhaps it is because I am not close enough to the Spirit. Who knows why, but He seems to be passing by my bed during the middle of the night to share with me insights, direction, wisdom and comfort.
And when that happens, I cannot get back to sleep, and the next day I seem so drowsy. There must be a lesson there. Besides the inspiration He gives me at 2 in the morning, there must be something I need to learn by His time table. I am going to have to work on that one.
As I start this day, I feel burdened, pressured, not my jovial, happy, AWAKE self. I would think part of it was because of the middle of the night visit, but part of it is because I am weighing too heavily other wimpy things that don't mean a thing in the Eternal view of things. It is my problem, I must get rid of it today. It is all in my ability to do so, I just must concentrate on my attitude, my testimony, and especially my faith.
Tonight Bonnie and I are visiting with our bishop to start papers, and other things to go on our mission. We have many questions. I am excited. In a bit more than four months we will have accomplished one of our goals, that of being out of debt ready to accept a call.
Based upon that fact, I feel I should dwell upon the many tender mercies that Father has blessed us with. A grateful heart is a joyful heart. A joyful heart is a happy heart. A happy heart is a positive heart, and a positive heart has to feel grateful for blessings. So I must get involved in the cycle of "being" so I can be who I feel I am. It is all in my ability, I just must want to do it.
We will see what the bishop says tonight.
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