DAY 71 -- Medications

On Thursday Night, Bonnie and I were singing at our rehearsal.  Music is such a blessing in our lives.  It can change a mood, improve an outlook, inspire someone, and it can calm a troubled heart.  We are singing a myriad of different songs, all are so wonderful, uplifting, fun, inspiring, etc.  We love doing it together.

Well, last night we were singing "So Many Voices..." which is our patriotic song for the upcoming concert, and while we were practicing that song, I felt that Bon and I would be going foreign.  So either we will be called away from these United States to a foreign country, or I have another undigested potato hung up in my stomach giving me false feelings.

Anyway, we shall see.  Within the next week, we will be finalizing our mission papers and pushing the button.  We just heard from Bonnie's brother that since he has medications that are required to keep him alive, and since he would not be able to acquire them where he wants to go, (I can't remember where, shows you my mind is slowly, or rapidly going, where is it going, away, far far away... either way I can't remember, but he and his wife were excited about going there)  the mission department rejected his request.

So, we must look at the meds we are required to take.  Bonnie has a few perscription meds she takes.  I do not have perscription ones I hate.  But we are wondering if that will dictate where we can go and where we cannot go.  I am sure the church missionary department does not want to sent seniors out into a place where they will be paying for a funeral.  There is so much to consider in this mission application.  Medication is just one more things to think about.

So perhaps medications that are required for an old person, or for a senior, will help dictate where that person serves as a missionary.  It also would mandate evaluating whether the medications that are taken are required to keep us out of a grave, or are they just placebos.  Well, you understand that comment.  Father can do many miracles and I know He is the author of many miracles for many senior missionaries across the world.

This is just one more part of our qualification to serve, and will help determine where we do.  I did not ever imagine that there were so many things to check out, evaluate, or such.  But the bottom line is we just put it in Father's hands and be happy no matter what, where, or when.

DAY 72 -- Speaking Spanish

Bonnie asked me the other day if I "saw myself" speaking Spanish on our mission.  I served in Mexico forty-plus years ago. I am sure I wasn't that fluent in Spanish, but I could get along, preach the gospel and get into trouble.  I guess that is to be considered when the Brethren look at our mission application papers. 

I spoke "missionary" Spanish, not "living" Spanish.  I mean if someone wanted to speak Spanish about the gospel, the Book of Mormon, about the plan of salvation, I was ready.  Of course it will take a bit of refreshing, study, and remembering.  But all is possible.  Is it like riding a bike?  If someone wanted to speak "real living" it would be harder, for I would have to learn to be a real person rather than one preaching the gospel.

As I have said before in this blog, senior couples are not often required nor asked to preach the gospel.  That is what the younger kids do.  Seniors are often encouraged to lend stability to the Kingdom in many different places across the world.  Seniors are often encouraged to help strengthen those less active. 

Do I "see myself" speaking Spanish in the area where we will go?  To be perfectly honest, I do not know.  I would be glad to go somewhere and speak Spanish.  I remember when coming home I was perfectly in love with the Lamanites, the Spanish language, and being with those humble, loving people.  That feeling of love and interest in them has many cobwebs, rust, and dirt around those memories. 

But let me say this:  No matter where we are called, I will thoroughly enjoy going wherever, learning whatever langauge I have to learn, doing whatever is required of me.  If it is speaking Spanish, then I will love it.  If it is speaking Zwahellislebe, then I will love it.  Bonnie has had the "feeling" that she needs to learn Spanish for the last few years.  She has purchased that speedy learning CD but never spent much time learning Spanish.  I am sure she will pick it up quickly, for she is smarter than I am, can learn faster, and all that.  So, to be fair, perhaps we need to go to a Spanish place so in a month or so, we both will be speaking Spanish fluently, me by practicing and her by learning from scratch.

Let me tell you, all these thoughts have to be going through our minds, for within about 14 days, we will push the button (Max) and submit our papers.  It won't be long now.

DAY 73 --- More Medical Preparations

Well, we are still getting medical things done.  My appointment with the dentist this morning was as a dentist appointment should be.  I was sitting there, shot full of gunk to make my head numb, then he put his hands and feet into my mouth.  I was only in the chair for one hour, but it takes many hours after that to get rid of that drug to make my cheeks feel fat and cause me to have a lisp.  Have to go back next week, and then he will submit our papers.  We are close. 

Our original goal was to submit papers in April and it looks like we will achieve that goal.  Then four or so weeks after that we shall know when and where we are to go.  It still seems like a vision, or something that is FAR FAR away on Judea's plain.  It just doesn't seem real, even when I was sitting in the dentist chair, listening to that drill searching for oil in my mouth, knowing that I was doing it getting ready to go away for 18 months.  It still feels "not real." 

Then it seemed too real.  I was sitting there with sixteen hands in my mouth, and I started to smile. (You ever do that? Try to smile when the community has their hands in your mouth?)  They asked why and I said it was because I knew that it was mainly to be prepared to go on a mission, and I could endure even more hands in my mouth if need be, for it was a requirement so we could go and serve. 

There are hungry people in all parts of the world, and hopefully Bonnie and I will be taking a suitcase, or heart case full of love, of service, and of compassion to give to all those hungry people.  We are packing those things in our mind as we read our scriptures, pray, go to the temple, and many other things.  We are packing, preparing, and anticipating what is coming. 

My boss said yesterday that he needed to replace me within 90 days.  I was amazed that it was that close. But it may be.  When seniors get their mission call, there is often a time they are needed, and thus they may be called upon to go quite rapidly.  And then there are times when it is a long time before they need you. Guess we will wait and see. We are putting our availability as of July 15, for my two daughters will have delivered by then.

DAY 74 -- Doing as I Should

I have finally decided where I want to go.  I want to go someplace where they don't have cell phones, where they don't have freeways, where they don't have mascara, where they don't have cars.  I was driving to work today and decided I would be more involved with those around me.  Thus I started to look at fellow drivers on the freeway.  Never again.

In one car that was going about 70, passing everyone, being so concerned about being in front of everyone, I observed this young kid concentrating on passing everyone he could.  As he passed me, he was also very busy dividing his time driving, passing everyone with his texting on his phone.  Every few seconds or so, he would be looking at his phone, punching another letter.  Must have been writing a love note, the Gettysburg Address, or who knows what.  I quickly let him pass me and half expected him to be wrapped around another car, a tree, or something.  It was scary.

Then this young girl ran a stop sign in front of me, almost made me hit her, and sped toward the freeway.  As she was hurrying to get to the freeway, she was also putting on her mascara, making her look pretty.  It also scared me.  So I quickly passed her and put her in my rear view mirror, afraid that she would also not get to her destination safely. 

Then, we all drive among those who feel they must be in front of us, saving themselves about two seconds arriving at their destination.  There were plenty of them this morning.  And there were many who must have been on their way to see their pregnant wife deliver, for they were speeding along the road, cutting in and out.

So, I would love to go to a mission where there are not cars, not people who endanger my life while they drive with their fast moving weapon we call a car.  Therefore, we may put on our papers we want to go to Africa, or Zimbabwe, or somewhere across the globe where we will be free from ....  Again I sin.

Perhaps that lady who was putting on mascara would probably be a very tender Spirit waiting for the missionaries to show up and baptise her.  Maybe that guy who was texting was arranging the baptismal font for a group who had been converted.  Who knows.  I guess another goal I have to make is overcoming the urge to JUDGE others and their actions.  Guess I will quit observing fellow drivers, and just make sure I am doing as I should.  Keeping my eyes straight ahead and not worrying about what is going on around me.

DAY 75 --- Where Do We Want To Go?

Everywhere I go, please ask where do you want to go?  Once we entertained the idea of going to Nauvoo.  It is funny that there is a two to three year waiting list to go to Nauvoo.  That brings up an interesting fact.  The Church is trying to satisfy the needs and the desire of senior couples.  They do have a place on the papers we fill out asking what is our preference.

Now there are many "kinds" of missions as well as locations.  We are asked what our experience has been.  That would be to support our goals and dreams of a mission.  There are missions where what you do is landscaping.  There are mechanical work, painting, doctoring, musical, etc.  There are kinds of missions, depending upon the couples wishes.  There are missions to serve in managing the Perpetual Education Fund.  There are those managing the fleet of vehicles in a mission. There are those at historical sights, as my parents served in Palmyra.  There are those to work with Family as my parents did in France.  There are many kinds of mission, not even considering the location.

There are missions to serve with the youth.  There are those to teach in Church Education System.  There are those to just nurture new members of the Church.  There are those to work on building temples as well as buildings.  There are those to serve in temples worldwide.  There is almost any kind of mission one would imagine.

And then of course there is the location to consider.  Since I speak Spanish, there are many countries in South America.  We would love to go overseas, away from the United States.  We would love to go to New Zealand, as well as Australia.  We would love to go to Europe, South Africa, the Middle East, and even to Alaska or Hawaii.

Where do we want to go?  Just somewhere to serve our Savior in the Kingdom. There are saints all over the world.  We will be happy no matter when they send us. 

On the bottom of the paper work, it asks something like, "Though you have put down your preferences, we would ask you to serve wherever the Brethren send you even if it is not according to what you have specified."  Where do we want to go?  We just want to go.

DAY 76 -- Time To Be Serious about Wait....

The other day I was looking at numbers and it reported that I have posted 300 times on this post.  WOW.  I am told that most people (I aint people) don't keep a blog going for 300 posts.  I could spend the rest of this post this AM trying to figure that out, but I won't.

Instead, I am reporting that three of my sons joined together and decided to start working on excessive weight.  So we met Saturday and decided to set our own goals to work on.  We all decide what we, individually, needed to work on as a starting point.  So, for the coming two weeks, we are going to strive to meet our initial goals.  I have three. One I am going to drink lots and lots of water.  That is a good thing I am told.  Second, I am going to stop eating candy at work.  Our secretary always bring in candy, and of course one thing she brings in is one of my favorite, cinnamon bears.  Third, I am going to try to walk a mile each day.

After two weeks, we are going to get together again and see how we are doing, modify our rules and regulations, and expand them or do whatever we feel is necessary.  We know ourselves better than Jenny Craig, or any of those diet people, thus we are going to strive to work on it ourselves.

Of course we are putting into the little plan the R and R principle.  No, not rest and relaxation, but the return and report principle.  Three times a week, we are going to expect a report from one of the other ones doing the same.  Thus we have to report how we are doing during the two week period before we analyze and modify our plan.

I feel this will help me, and help them be more diligent in doing what we know we need to do, and in my case, drop about 15 pounds in the next four months, or sooner.  I am sure I will be able to jump tall buildings, run faster than a speeding bullet, and even fit into some of those pants that have gotten smaller through the past weeks and months.  Another goal! 

Also we are getting closer to submitting our papers, and thus talking more about what we are going to put down on our preferences.  Interesting time right now...  Exciting.  Also I am starting on the trial of attending the dentist for the next millennium trying to get those teeth into shape to serve a mission.

DAY 77 -- Trials To Perfect Us

There are times when we are "blessed" with long suffering, long enduring Ammonihah Challenges.  In our mind there is no reason why Father won't resolve those challenges, rid us from those trials.  We pray, continue to pray and struggle through.  There are times when we figure that we will have to endure those struggles throughout our lives.  We continue to pray about them, but they need to be with us no matter what.

We KNOW that Father has the power to rid us of those AC's, and we don't understand why He won't.  So we continue to struggle, question, and plead with Father for relief.  We continue to ask through our prayers, visiting the temple and plead with Father to help us learn the principle, or the lesson attached with that AC.  But it is not taken away from us.  We continue, as does our trial. 

I am sure that Prophet Joseph questioned why he was constantly pursued by wicked men, incarcerated, and finally murdered.  He endured more than we can imagine. He was the prophet to restore the church to the earth.  He endured, yet he finished his work.  His constant suffering was not taken away, and he continued doing what he was called to do.

I can't see through Father's eyes.  I can't understand all the reasons why of our trials, of my AC's.  But I know that there are Eternal reasons why we are blessed with these AC's.  I have come to accept that the trails I have that don't seem to want to go away, they are for my good, and will be for but a small moment. I must stop trying to figure out how to get rid of them, quit being so frustrated that I have them, endure them well, and continue to strive to learn from them.  For when the purpose they are given to me is realized they will be removed from me.

I remember a period of about 5 years where I was constantly having kidney stones.  I felt that those little tiny "blessings" would never go away.  For 5 years, I was constantly having those little things.  Finally, after I guess I learned whatever I was to learn, they seemed to go away and I have not had one for 8 years. 

Bottom Line:  Father knows the reasons why of our AC's and what we have now and what He blesses us with-to teach us, to direct us, and to perfect us.  Much is endurance.   If it is "thorn" I must endure for a time, so be it. 

DAY 78 --- Another Ammonihah Challenge

I was reading in Alma this morning when I read about Alma and Amulek as they were preaching to the people of Ammonihih.  As I read, a statement jumped off the page to me.  It was when Alma said that if they did not repent, the Lord would destroy the city.  Then he said that the people of that city did not believe that God could do such a "wonderful" thing.  They were incredulous of the fact that Deity can do whatever they want, even destroying a large city like Ammonihah in one day.  As we know, it did happen just as Alma said it would.  The city was destroyed in one day.

As I pondered upon that truth, I was told again that Father can do whatever He wants to do, even destroy a city, even award us $50,000 for our mission, even correct little, or large infirmities, even heal every aspect of old age that is causing concerns for us, etc.  He can do whatever He wants to do.

He can relieve us from any and all challenges we have, if He desires.  Instead of permitting us to struggle with all of them, He has chosen to let us struggle to overcome small and large challenges.  Therefore, I choose to label these foibles of age, or of weakness, or any foibles or weaknesses, or trials, our Ammonihah Challenges.  I will refer to them as the AC's of life.

Father uses the AC's of life to teach us lessons, to help us work on perfecting our patience, to help us develop our faith, etc.  Every single Ammonihah Challenge of our individual, personalized path in this mortality is used by Father to teach important, Eternal lessons that are required to pass our test in our final of  mortality to receive a Celestial Grade. 

So as I ponder about this concept, this revelation to me, I must accept that all the AC's that I have, are either tools used by Father to teach me lessons, (and there so many lessons I must learn through them) or as Paul's calls them, a thorn in my side to give me the chance to prove myself in spite of this thorn, or that thorn, or whatever I am called upon to live with throughout my life on earth, with no answer, no relief, or no resolution of this or that particular thorn throughout my life.

I must practice being grateful for each Ammonihah Challenge, knowing that Father knows of them and will either remove them in His time, or use them to teach me.  Thanks Father, let me keep this concept in my mind!

DAY 79 -- Where to go?

We need to make a list.  There are so many things to do.  We have a storage unit that is about half full.  We also have a room where we are living, and a room full of our stuff.  We need to decide whether we are going to keep paying a storage unit while we are gone, or are we going to set fire to it all? 

We also have to figure out what we are going to do with our car.  Do we sell it? Do we let our kids use it? Or just let it sit for 18 months?  We also need to outfit us, purchasing clothing for wherever we are going.  We need to wait until we get the call to decide what we need, what will be on the list that we need to purchase.

We feel pretty comfortable with our medical info, but who knows.  They might find something that is not done, has to be done, or something.  You never know.  We have to go to the optometrist also to check our eyes to assure we can see adequately.  Just another doctor. 

We will probably be here, in this are at least until July or August.  It depends upon the circumstances of the mission.  At times they say they need someone and that is immediately.  However, we have two grand kids coming and thus we will need to take  that into account when we leave. 

There is so much to do to get ready.  But we have a few days to do so.  It occupies our mind constantly, and every day we talk about it.  Excitement is growing. 

One asked me where I wanted to go.  I said I didn't care.  Then he said, where do you NOT want to go.  Laughingly, I said I don't want to go to Tooele.  Then I had to repent, why not?  Even in Tooele, there are people hungry for truth and spirit.  So I have to modify my wishes, I will go anywhere.  I would even fly to the moon to talk to those Martains waiting for the gospel.  I am ready!

DAY 80 -- Working Toward The Realization of this Dream

Well, needle prick by shot, by test, by evaluation, we are getting ready to go on our mission.  I guess it takes all that is being done to us.  I would assume they should check how often we go to the temple, how often we read our scriptures, how often we do our home teaching, how often we pray, and how often we even think of our mission.  All those things prepare us to go and serve. 

Physical health is an important preparation.  They don't want us spending our time in the hospital in foreign lands I would presume.  They don't want us being sick and afflicted, or suffering from inadequate medical attention when we are in a land that doesn't have phones, cars, transportation, or even nurses.

(When I was in Mexico, I acquired hepatitus.  I was in a small "clinic" and a "nurse" came into me and said she was just trained to be a nurse the night before, having about thirty minutes of training.  She promptly tried to stuff into my arm a IV, but after twenty minutes of "searching" in my arm, making it bleed all over the floor, she gave up.) I guess the Headquarters don't want us to have a similar experience, for those of old age, such as me,  may just die from such an experience, at least the shock would give me pause.

We are still on track to have our papers ready to submit in the first of April.  I believe we can still be ready for that.  There is so much to do to prepare to even be ready to submit our papers, but we are slowly approaching the finish line.  At last the finish line to submit papers.

Then I hear it will be four weeks after that.  So in about half of that 80 days mentioned at the top of this post, we will have our call.  That is barring any other road blocks, spiders in the wind shield, missed PSA tests that some doctor forgot to do, or anything else that will slow things down.  At least we can do all we need to do to be able.  Then we wait and see what others do, if they do, and when they do.

We are still excited.  There are times when we are sitting there, and almost break out laughing with joy, anticipating the upcoming call from our Savior.  Who cares about debt, obstacles, so many things to do, and the last of that $50,000 that I never did find under any rock or at the end of a rainbow.  We will be as ready as we can be in 80 days.

DAY 81 -- ONE More Shot, Please!

It is interesting that once in a while, things go haywire, wrong, awful, road blockish, to the tubes, in the toilet, and so on and so forth.  I am sure this happens to anyone pursuing a dream or a vision.  I am sure it doesn't just happen to me since we are going on a mission.  But it sure seems like it.

Yesterday, as I was driving to work, of course on the freeway, I was watching the road in front of me and I saw this small projectile coming straight at my face, eye level.  It was a rock, and I quickly moved my head, part of a reflex.  Well this LITTLE rock smacked into my windshield and created a dent.  No not a dent in my head, nor the window, but a spider, which I am sure is going to grow legs and become large, right in front of my eyes.  Nice huh?

Then as I was driving onward, looking around that spider, this crazy young lady just decided to merge into my lane.  I was in the far left lane and she almost sent me into the barrier.  I don't often honk my horn, but I did this morning cause I was almost sent into an accident.  She didn't seem to notice and blissfully continued her path along the freeway. 

All things come in threes, right?  Well my doctor in Brigham City called today and said that the PSA test, the one they extract about two gallons of blood for, well that one, the doctor who was supposed to do the PSA test just didn't do it.  And for some reason, my blood expired.  It is a good thing I was not attached to that blood or I would have also expired.  Anyway, since he did not do it, the blood they took from me, is no longer GOOD.  Thus I have to go find someone else who would be "happy" to take another gallon or two of blood to do a PSA test.  I already feel like a pin cushion.  So, next Monday I am going to ANOTHER happy needle wielding person to take blood to do the PSA test.  What next?  What is PSA anyway?

Also, I had to go with Bonnie to get our immunizations, or shots to make sure we don't gete TB, Hepatitus, and even Chicken Pox, Polio, a head ache, sore thumbs, and diptheria, and a myriad of other diseases.  I guess I can see that they are important, for we would not want to grow another foot, or leg while we serve in another country, and those shots are supposed to prevent that from happening.  However, it is amazing that the cost associated with preparing to serve a mission keeps growing like the national debt. I believe we are up to about three hundred million gazillion billion by now, right? 

I was told we also need to add to our national debt by going to get eye exams also.  My nose has been running faster than a marathoner and thus we better go find a nose doctor also.  Then I have this tiny pain in my quadracept (Don't really know what that is, nor where it is found, but I am sure we need to have it checked out before we can go.)  that needs to be checked out and special pills to relieve those pains brought on by doing whatever bothers it.

Being foolish is one way to cope with all these tests.  Guess I need to repent and get in line for another shot. 

DAY 82 -- He Is Always As Close As We Desire...

When Elder Maxwell explained that our Father was very close to our personal lives, he explained that He was involved with everything we go through each day.  He said that Father was using every experience we had to nurture us, teach us, educate us, and help us grow and progress to become more spiritual.

I often wonder how close that really is.  Is it me that determines how close Father is to my life, or is it circumstances?  Does He come closer when I read my scriptures, when I make fervent, heart felt prayer?  Does He distance Himself when I am not as Christ-like as I should be?  Is he still close when I get angry with another?  Is He close when I lose my temper or lose a bit of my faith?  Or is His closeness constant, it is just me being able to feel His presence?

I have felt when I am in tune with that sweet Spirit that He is as close as I want Him to be.  At any time, I can talk with him.  I am reminded of a  movie long ago entitled, "Fiddler on the Roof."  The main man, Tevya, often pauses in his life and looks upward and starts talking with Father.  I believe that is as it should be.  I believe that Father is constantly watching over us, protecting us, making sure that we are never alone, as long as we desire it.  Even when we do not feel worthy of His influence, He is still there, watching, caring, pleading with us.  At no time does a father or mother stop loving their children, even when the children choose the wrong path. I am Father in Heaven is the same, even more perfect in His love and support of us.

I feel that my Father is with me constantly.  He would always be with me, and His ear is always attuned to my pleading, my questions, my prayers, and my queries.  I am sure He is always smiling at me and my foibles and mistakes.  I am sure He is disappointed when I do not feel Him close, feel His love, and all that because I have alienated myself from Him.  But He is still there and willing to answer prayers, spur of the moment queries, and especially needed pleas for help and support. All I have to do is be worthy of feeling Him there.

He is there, it is just whether we can feel Him, feel that love that is always there and His interest in us. I remember fondly the song, "You're not alone."  I love that song, for it teaches correct principles. I know He is close.  I know He knows my frustrations and my fears.  I know He is watching as we get closer and closer to our mission.  He is there.

DAY 83 --- Feelings Of The Coming Days

While I was growing up, I anticipated, waited for, and anxiously counted the days until I was privileged to receive the Melchizedek Priesthood and become an elder and then be sent out into the world to be a missionary. I couldn't imagine the joy that awaited me to serve full time, 24/7 in His work. It was a dream that was slow in coming, though I was in the mission field a few days before I turned 19.  What a joy it was to be involved full time in serving Father and His Son Jesus Christ in the goals of Moes 1:39. 

Then as I returned I created another goal that is only 83 days away.  I feel the same anticipation, excitement of serving full time, 24/7 in the service of Father and His Son.  Not being involved with, nor concerned about the "thin" things of life, just being involved with the Eternal things of life.

I know that there are many things that must be in place for anyone to serve, to leave for many months to be a missionary. I know that many seniors cannot go because of many reasons.  I know that there is a desire, but that desire won't be fulfilled in this life.  Thus I feel very honored to be where we are today, looking toward the coming few months and then going to work with Divinity in His work.  There are concerns, there are road bumps, there are things that have to be overcome, and that is what these days are for. 

Often, I pause to envision those we will meet and those we will serve.  Often I consider those brothers and sisters who are far away from where we are right now.  I can't put a name or face to them, but they are there waiting for Bonnie and myself to meet them, teach them, and touch them, help them to see the importance of the Kingdom of God.  Just as we shall meet them and influence them, the will touch our lives in a unique way and help us see the things of Eternity in a clearer way

What a joy awaits us!  There is much to do before that, but we shall continue to prepare and overcome all obstacles.  Father is in charge and is directing us along the path of realizing these visions and dreams. 

DAY 84 -- No Stress Test, Hallelujah

It is amazing for me to look at the title and see that the number of days until M day is in only double digits.  Only 84 days.  I was talking to my daughter last night and she asked me if we could return to Brigham City again and spend a night with them.  We just returned and she wants us back.  How nice.  Anyway, I told her that as we got closer and closer to M day, we would be more and more busy.

There is a mountain of things we have to do, even without knowing where we are going to be going.  I am sure there is also another mountain of things we have to do that we have not even thought about. I should write another book.

Anyway we went to our doctors yesterday to accomplish one more thing that needs to be done before submitting our papers.  Bonnie went at 10, and so did I, different doctors, but just a few doors apart in Brigham. 

My doctor looked at me and asked me if I could throw a softball from left field to home base.  I laughed and said, "One day I could..."  We had a pleasant visit and he answered many questions.  Bottom line, if I don't hear from him by this Tuesday, he will have sent my papers into my bishop.  I was out in twenty minutes. 

Bonnie was there for 90 minutes and had a great conversation, visit with her doctor. We are friends with our doctors, that is why we went to Brigham.  Bottom line is it looks like we WILL NOT HAVE TO HAVE a stress test.  Now just to get my crazy teeth fixed.  Still on our way to submit our papers in April.

Yes, I am very excited.  Only 4 days and we will be "almost" on our mission.  We will celebrate our fortieth anniversary.  Bonnie's doctors said we should request going to Israel. Now don't get too excited, or confused, her doctor met a few who were serving there, not exactly as missionaries, but serving.  Fun.  Bonnie wants to put a list about a mile long about where we want to go.  I want to just tell the Lord to send us wherever He needs us.  Guess time will dictate.

DAY 85 -- Remembering

In Alma 5, Alma repeatedly asks the question if we have retained in our mind sufficiently, or have we remembered...  As we tackle different things in our quest for being missionaries, I pause to consider what remembering would do, how it would help, how it would make a difference in our journey.  Or would it?

Remembering infers that we recall to our conscious mind lessons, events, experiences, and even revelations.  Since I am even older than dirt, I have a wealth of memories and experiences to remember.  Let me pause and select an event and recall it to my mind and see what happens.

As I dust off the cobwebs in my mind, I "remember" a few experiences I had as a missionary.  (Appropriate since that is where this blog, this dream, and this goal is taking Bonnie and me.) The first I fondly recall, I was sitting with a group of missionaries in the LTM.  (That means Language Training Mission, for us older than dirt people.)  We had just been told that a fellow missionary just received word that his dad was found after being a prisoner of war in Viet Nam.  The feeling was electric.  As the prayer was offered I had a very special experience with my Father in Heaven.  As I pause to remember that, I "almost" re-experience it again.  I can remember those feelings and the concepts and truths I was taught.

Another time when I was in Villahermosa, this experience also involved prayer.  I was asking Father the why's and when's of my mission. It was in my first city with a "lazy" missionary.  Again, as I recall those memories to my mind, I "relive" the lessons I  learned and that whole experience while praying. 

Both of these short experiences bore witness to me of Father's love for me and my circumstances at that time.  As I "remember" experiencing those two memories, bringing them to my mind once again, as well as many others, it gives me strength.  It reminds me of lessons learned.  It gives me the commitment that I can continue onward on this journey, no matter the speed bumps or Lamanites that attack.

Remembering helps us "FEEL" testimony and recommit to the truths we know.  I can see why there are hundreds of times this word is used in the Book of Mormon.  In Alma 5, I can understand why he keeps asking if we have remember sufficiently certain things.  I can accept the importance of remembering.  Perhaps I should take time every day to pause and "REMEMBER."  I guess it is a form of bearing testimony of the things we know and hold so dear.

NOTE:  Today, we are both going to the physician to see if the flesh is capable to let the spirit do what we want to do, serve a mission.

Day 86 -- Comfort Beyond Compare

Today while I was reading Alma, I read in chapters 2-4 about when the Amlicites were fighting the Nephites.  As I read that there were about 20,000 killed, THEN a Lamanite army came upon them and they continue to fight.  They were uncountable, according to the record we have.  But we are told that the Nephites were strengthened and supported in the battle, and they were victorious.

As I was pondering those scriptures, I felt another witness that Father is near.  Just as He knew what was happening with those Nephites in their battles with the Lamanites, just as He strengthened them in their struggle with the Lamanites, He is also aware of Bonnie and I in our struggles with crowns, cavities, and finances.  I felt this great peaceful feeling that He can, and will take care of our enemies, those who want to delay our service, or realizing this dream of being missionaries. 

All the way to work (25 minutes) I communed with Father.  He told me that He was aware and would be there when I needed Him just as He always was with the Nephites.  He would help take care of this obstacle of dental work.  He would help pave the way, for He wants us to be out there serving in the Kingdom.  He reiterated that He is my Father and is totally aware of where we are, and our goals and dreams.

It is so comforting to know that my Father, who is all powerful, all knowing, and loving is close to me through these preparations, through this final year before we go.  If I really believe that, then what could possibly get in the way of our will combined with His?  Why nothing of course.  Ammon said in Alma 26, "Yea I know that I am nothing, as to my strength I am weak.... for in His strength I can do all things."  I feel that today.  With Him as my partner, WE can do all things, no matter crowns, stress tests, speed bumps, hiccups, or no matter any Lamanite attacking.  Dwelling upon this truth can surely give comfort no matter the obstacle.

Day 87 -- One New Idea To Earn Additional Income

Well, Bonnie went too the dentist today. I knew there was a reason why I fell in love with her.  She has the rock solid teeth that I was not given.  She has no cavities, no need for crowns, no need for constant attention as I do, and she was given a clean bill of dental health.  So, the first leg of our medical journey has been completed (sort of, except the work I need done in my head) and will only cost us about $2000.  Nice huh?  The dentist decided only to require two crowns not three.  Miracle?  Blessing?  Either way, thanks. 

I am still looking for another way to earn the dental amount, and possibly the physicians amount.  Don't know how much but do know that I need to work another job, or something, right?  Maybe I will sell smiles?  Or perhaps my ginger cookies, or my honey butter, or some dehydrated San Francisco Fog.  All you have to do is add one to two cups of water, put it on the stove, bring to boil, and then within a few minutes you will see the fog start to creep over the sides of the pan.  Then you can have your own San Francisco fog. 

I really thought of selling that, one year in the long past.  I have a few obstacles with that one, but it is a good idea, and perhaps it would sell in airports everywhere?  I would have to go to San Francisco on a foggy day, collect lots of it into cans, or even zip lock bags, and then seal it into "soup" cans.  At least that is the size of can I thought I would use. Good idea, huh?  Maybe I just need a zip lock bag to hold it?  I will have to see if I can find an expert to help me in that arena.

Any ideas my readers might have?  We could split the profits! 

Well, now we know where we are - in Dental Bondage, at least my mouth is while Bonnie's is not. 

Bonnie feels that there is a mission president out there somewhere who is waiting for Bill and Bonnie.  We just need to know who and where.  No clue as of today, but we shall see as time continues to bring us along the path.

DAY 88 -- Peace, Peace

After yesterday when I am going to be crowned three more time, thus making my head have twelve crowns in it, I let the challenge of our tight budget get in the way for a few minutes.  We both decided that we may have to put off our mission for a few months to pay for that, let alone if we are going to need to pay for a stress test.  (You see, living with Bonnie and she with me, may put us both under stress???) 

As I lived with knowing that another unplanned expenditure of around $4000 or so, just for my teeth gave us pause.  However, as I thought about it, a calm peace flooded my mind and soul.  As I awoke this morning, I had another peaceful feeling that though a surprise appeared yesterday involving our finances, so what. Father is in charge and can, and will make sure we go, when we are scheduled to go in His grand itinerary and we will go where He desires us to go.  No matter about crowns, stress tests, or anything else.

I just feel very peaceful knowing that all money, schedules, the world, even the election of the US in 2012, all are in His hands, and all things will happen according to His will.  Money challenges will not get in the way of His management of our schedule, our call, etc.

So though the exact manner of when we go, how we will be totally out of debt, and where our destination is, it will be and has always been in His hands.  I just feel peaceful as I realize I shall spend hours sitting in that dentist chair, but none of that will influence our mission, when, and where we go.

Another miracle?  Surely.  An obstacle that really isn't an obstacle, it is just an event that will increase our faith, and permit another miracle to happen.  Thanks be to Father for letting me accept this small speed bump in the road toward our mission and feel very comfortable that all will proceed as He desires, not letting us stress out over more crowns, speed bumps, unforeseen obstacles, and delays.

DAY 89 --- Dentist Report, at least half of it.

Well, I went to the dentist and shocker.  I was told I need three crowns.  I was "blessed" with rotten teeth in my sojourn in this mortality.  So now I have to get three crowns and two cavities fixed before we go.  I guess that is another miracle.  Would my teeth are just falling apart be a miracle?  This will probably put off our mission for a few months.  Originally we were going to say we would be ready to go after our number 19 and number 20 grandchild is born. But now, unless there is another major financial miracle, we shall just not quit our jobs until we have paid off my dentist after he does what he says needs to be done, and whatever Bonnie finds out Wednesday, and whatever the other two find out this Saturday.

I do not feel totally devastated.  I know there are always reasons things happen.  "All things have been done in the wisdom of him who knoweth all things."  There are reasons why I must have three crowns.  Maybe to make me feel like royalty?  Or perhaps the location that Father wants us to serve won't be opening up until after we have paid all that off.  Who knows, but we tackle whatever challenge, or whatever obstacle is presented to us and do so as rapidly as we can, THEN go. 

We are still excited and anxious to go.  We have heard stories from others who have gone.  We hear stories, testimonials, and this dream/goal of 89 days is coming and I am very excited as Bonnie is. 

I am sure that we have not seen all the miracles that await us either.  Onward and upward.  We have not been given any insurmountable obstacle yet, and so we are still preparing to go and realize this dream.  Don't know exactly when, have to wait until we see what the other doctors say.  But we are going.  Not sure when or where, but we are going.

Day 90 --Hit Me Over The Head and Knock Me Out!

Today starts MEDICAL week.  We have our doctor's appointments.  I start today, Monday at the dentist.  A few months ago, I had a new crown put on the left side of my mouth.  Then almost immediately, I had another pain in the right side side of my mouth. So as I go today, I may have another crown to replace and stop the pain I was feeling.  I guess we need another miracle.  Bon will go to the dentist Wednesday.  Then Saturday, we go to Brigham to get our physical exam to verify that we are still alive and can walk a mile or six.

I filled out more papers yesterday.  They asked if I ever had shoulder problems.  I laughed.  I was playing softball as our family often did, and since I am such a stud, I was throwing the ball from left field all the way into home base, and threw my right shoulder out of it's socket.  Talk about painful.  It is almost as bad as those kidney stones.  Anyway, I went to the doctor, and this "slight" nurse could not put it back, they had to put me out, and then TWO of them had to force it back into it's socket.

Then two months later, my right shoulder was not healed sufficiently to use it, so I decided to go and play racquetball with my oldest son, Will.  I figured I could still beat him using my left hand.  So we started, and some time in the second game, I threw my left shoulder out of it's socket.  I was sitting there on the floor, and I told Will to hit me so hard on the head that I could be knocked out.  It was too painful.  I didn't want to bear the pain of that again.  My right hadn't healed enough and now I had the left out of place.

I don't know why, but he decided that he couldn't, wouldn't hit his father over the head to knock him out.  NO I didn't ground him, I just groaned and groaned while he drove me to the hospital.  (This is totally true!) 
Yes, I had to record that on our mission papers.  One was done playing softball, and a few months later, the other was done playing racquetball.  (...and I was winning too when it happened.  I was crushed.  At least my memories tell me that.  Of course Will doesn't remember it that way.) 

I wonder if that piece of information will help the brethren decide where to send us and where not to send us.  Who knows.  Of course I had to tell them about my six babies, or kidney stones.  On dear sister said that she felt delivery of a baby was less painful than delivering a kidney stone.  And so I figure that I have had at least six babies, delivered them all, didn't name them or bless them, but did deliver them.  Had help with two of them though, they were breech or just didn't want to come.

Well, tomorrow is Medical Week.  Let's see if Father has a few miracles in store, or a few more challenges or obstacles to endure before our mission call this summer.

DAY 91 -- Brother Joseph

I was privileged to teach today about Joseph Smith.  I bore witness that this summer Bonnie and I were going to leave and go somewhere to help in the preaching to the world about Joseph Smith.  His name is recognized far and wide, and we get to help spread it more.

We discussed Emma and all the things she went through.  I have ten High Priests who love to share and it is so easy to be the discussion leader in HP as they all help share their thoughts.  I have had, and do have now a larger appreciation of Emma.  Trying to support her husband as a father to her children, a spouse, and then a leader of a new church, a prophet, etc, would have been a very challenging duty.  I pay honor and respect to her today.

Joseph's descendants suffered from the challenges he had.  Many are not members of the church and struggle with the teaching of the church.  Many are agnostic.  I am sure this hurts Brother Joseph as he sees clearly the importance of accepting the gospel of Jesus Christ.   

He was truly a very great man.  As I read the scripture in D and C about what he has done for mankind, I was again amazed at the list of things he did for me, for us, and for the world.  As we discussed him, I am also amazed at the trials, the challenges, and the afflictions he suffered through, being a prophet as well as the days before he went to the grove to see the Father and Son.  We paused in High Priests and sang, "Praise to the man..." and thoroughly enjoyed being reminded about him and his life.

He sealed his testimony leaving his wife, his family, his friends, his counselors, and his beloved church.  I am sure as the final minutes of his life passed before him, knowing that he was going to die, he worried about all of those groups. But I am also sure that he commended his life into the hands of Father. 

I know one day I shall see and talk with him, for I have questions I would like to ask of him.  I pay my heart felt respect to Brother Joseph today.  He was truly chosen for such a challenging responsibility to usher in this last dispensation.

DAY 92 -- Cheerfully!

It never ceases to amaze me to read about Alma in the wilderness.  He was in a type of bondage to Amulon, a former Priest of King Noah.  Alma and his people were even prevented from praying, yet they raised their hearts to God.

It is reported that God was so impressed with their endurance, their "submitting cheerfully" that he said he would release them from bondage.  I wonder when we are given "bondage" type trials, if we submit to them "cheerfully," will He look to release us from our bondage.  I often wonder looking back over my blessings of bondage, my trials, if I endured them cheerfully?  It reports in the book of Mosiah that He made their bondage light.  The trial was lessened.  It was easier to endure them.  I wonder if He does that today.  In the trials we get to endure, I wonder if He makes it easier to endure, to live through?  Perhaps he does and we just don't realize it.  Perhaps we are released from our bondage and we don't thank Him for His management of our burdens.  Do we always see His hand when it is there?

Our financial bondage has been one of many years.  I find when I dwell upon those trials, the debt that was unfair in the first place, the debt that kept showing up years after the bowling in Brigham, etc, I wonder if we were released from what it could have been?  Though lingering, added debt kept showing up demanding attention, perhaps rather than look at the unexpected debt that kept appearing, we should have looked at the debt as a lesser of two, or three or four other debts that we did not get.  Our financial bondage is almost eliminated.  Figuratively the doors will open, we shall walk out free of debt and bondage.  Our debt prison will be released and we will be free.  Did we submit cheerfully while enduring it?  Not as cheerfully as we could have, or should I say, as I could have.

DAY 93 -- Trying To Envision The Miracles Coming

Today I was walking along and all of a sudden, it came to me.  I am going on a mission with my Eternal Companion.  Memories of my mission flooded back into my mind and I almost missed a step and fell to the ground.  I am going to be a missonary.  I am going to be a messenger of Christ helping in the Kingdom in some part of the world.  We are going to meet, serve, and love a new circle of friends.  What a joy awaits us.

I let miracles flow through my mind I experienced when I was in South East Mexico.  I remember many times giving such thanks for those miracles.  I remember receiving miracles that were not even thought of, nor asked for.  I remember feeling so inspired by the Spirit, being directed each day with the Spirit where to go to seek those honest in heart.  I remember being "told" what to say to those investigators.  I remember seeing miracles in the lives of others as they grasped the gospel and changed their lives.  I remember feeling so humble and grateful as I watched beloved members fellowship new converts.

The memories could go on and on.  Now those memories are goals, dreams, and anticipated experiences that we shall share as we give our time, talents, and testimonies.  I am so excited.  It will be such a glorious experience to share it with Bonnie, let her experience what I did before, see her glean from miracles happening all around us.  What a blessing it is to serve as a missionary no matter what age, no matter what circumstance, no matter.

As I continued my walk I realized that just being exactly where we are is a miracle, being so close to pushing the button in submitting our mission papers in about ONE month.  I can envision  my Father and Mother in Heaven being pleased that we are so excited to serve in the field, where the field is white and ready to harvest.  93 days only.

DAY 94 -- More Miracles

Is it wrong to ask for a miracle?  Since I am reporting on miracles, would it be OK to ask Father for another one?  Will He think me ungrateful, or should I just expect one? "If we have the faith of a mustard seed..."  I guess we should develop the faith of a mustard seed, then ask, and then expect the miracle. 

Next week is going to be called "medical week."  We go and get our teeth looked at and then cleaned.  Then on Saturday, we travel to Brigham City to get the rest of us looked at.  That wonderful stress test is a goblin haunting us.  No fears about us being healthy enough to serve, the fear is  in those medical people demanding that we have stress tests.  Time and money for them would throw a wet rag into our plans.

Bonnie's family has all had cholesterol in their past.  Her father died of complications of that, and possibly just because of that.  Bon has been working forever to reduce her high cholesterol.  She is a trooper.  But once before she was working forever to reduce it and it did not happen.  So, that is our fear, and that is our desired miracle.  We both are concerned with what the doctors will find.  I guess when you get as old as dirt, as we are, then "things" can appear out of the blue that could cause concern.

My father died of cancer.  My mother had arrhythmia or breathing problems.  My brother was electrocuted.  Oops.  That isn't something we will fear, but having something in our past, present, and worrying about our future health wise could dictate things concerning our mission.  So next week, medical week, will be the week that we pray for, have faith for, and hope that as we finish our medical week, we will be deemed, judged, and approved totally health to go anywhere we are needed.

So we are praying for miracles next week preparation for our med week.  If we are supposed to go through those stress tests, we will and we will continue to be excited about our mission.  Nothing can get us down, but why not pray for miracles?  Thus we are so doing.

Miracles happen every day.  If we are in tune and look for them, they are everywhere.  Too often I am in my own little world and don't look for them.  But they are all over.  I just want to see one that we desire, pray for, have faith in, and we shall see....

DAY 95 -- Report of Progress, Miracles

As I look and realize that we only have 95 days, I am beginning to have the world begin to crush me.  I mean, there is so much to do to get ready to leave, go away, find another place to live.  Many have gone before showing that it is possible and there is nothing to worry about, nor be concerned about.  So onward and upward.

I paused just now and went back to the first blog I did a LONG time ago.  I realized that one of the reasons I decided to post daily was to mention miracles that we experience in moving toward our mission.  So I will strive to do that now.

Health.  Bonnie has had great health in the last months.  I have been afflicted with problems almost since June.  At least twice, and maybe three times to the doctor for big meds.  But I have been exercising the last two weeks and I am feeling better.  We must be healthy too be able to serve as missionaries.  I feel it a miracle that I can go out and exercise daily.  I am building up, and shall be the specimen that I have always been.  After the storm comes the calm.  I assume I am entering into the calm.  We are both now exercising and feeling good about our physical preparation.  There have been miracles in this area of our preparation.
Bonnie has enjoyed a miracle, or great health in driving coughing, sneezing, sick kids to school every day.  Germs floating around her bus, around her head, and into  her head, but she has been blessed with health.  (Maybe I need to be exposed to germs and then I shall be healthier?)

Spiritual Preparation:  As already shared, we are reading the Book of Mormon again, from January until June.  We are in Mosiah teaching about Alma and the waters of Mormon, the trees of Mormon, the river Mormon, and so many other Mormon's.  I just finished reading the March Ensign.  We are reading another book together, and our spiritual preparation is going along fine.  We are singing in a group and singing the songs of Zion and others and this is helping out also.  We try to go the temple once a week, but more often it is twice a month.  We are discussing our mission every day now, for there is so much to do and decide.  I feel our relationship with our Maker is in the right place.  We are ready to share testimony, time and talents with anyone, anywhere.  Father is directing us, walking with us, and we are prepared spiritually. That is not to say there are not more spiritual roads and bridges to cross, we are just about where we need to be, as long as I am judging.

Financial:  This month we will pay off one of the loans we had to take out in operating the bowling alley.  It is a miracle that we are almost out of debt.  You must be out of debt to serve a mission.  Our financial plan to be out of debt will be realized in March.  We have a wonderful family who is committing to help us on our mission.  They are all offering to help, even my sisters.  The church has also made changes that will assist in Senior Couples serving missions.  Another miracle.  Also, our High Priests Group and our ward will help, according to our bishop. Another miracle.  Those medical personnel who are going to cut us, look at us, evaluate us, check our stress, and have us cough into a cup, spit into a cup, say ahhhh, and all of that stuff, they will help us out by not charging the full amount, at least that is what we expect.  Will report on that later. Another miracle.  There are many happening. Father is paving the way toward the next 95 days.

Miracles continue to happen, for He is in charge and wants us to serve somewhere.

DAY 96 -- It Could Be Worse

I would assume the reason that we have to go through such medical attention is the Church wants to assure that we are not going to die while serving on our mission.  They ask so many questions about our health that I can't help but wonder.  If someone needs some kind of medication, they want to assure that wherever we go we can get the medication we need, like chocolate bars, cinnamon bears, fluffy marshmellow, and nuts.

It would not be wise to send out missionaries who were not healthy and then have the spend their time in bed, not being effective.  So I guess I am in favor of getting the medical attention we need to get, though expensive, we do as asked, and assume that there is no need for a stress test, hopefully.

I talked to a few friends of ours who just came home from their mission and they said that we better be in shape because much is expected of us.  We will be expected to exercise there, as well as before to be ready and remain ready to do what is physically required of us.  That is fine.  Bonnie exercises almost every day.  I started last week, and have been doing quiet well with my health.  It is truly a blessing from Father that I can exercise, for the last little while, a few years, I have been unable to do so.

I young man today asked me a question. He had been struggling with a head ache that was very severe.  He asked if he had to look forward to that type of pain and discomfort throughout the rest of his life.  He looked to me as if I was almost dead and I had lived most of my life.  NOT SO. But it made me chuckle.  I explained to him that I had this ruptured disk and could not lift much.  He was afraid that he was doomed to be in pain all throughout his life.  I smiled and said that this body of our was not designed to be totally healthy, running marathons until we turned 100.  I told him that most people I know ache, have pains, and just live with them.  Most people I know learn through their health challenges.  I told him that he would also, as he got older.

But as I consider other's health problems, I am truly blessed. Father has not deemed in His wisdom to give me anything that would keep me home from a mission, not even stress.  He has and is blerssing me with health and I am so grateful.

The other day I told Bonnie when we were talking of something,  "It could be worse."  Then I said, "Guess what?  It is worse."  She started to laugh, bringing on those beloved endorphins.  They keep one young.  Just looking in the mirror gives me my daily dosage.  

DAY 97 -- Medical Attention is Coming for Us

Well, we have to start getting our medical stuff  done.  So today we are setting up our medical appointments. We will drive to Brigham City in a few weeks to be seen of those doctors who will tell us all about us.  They will verify how many steps we can take a day without breaking out in a swet. They will tell us if we are stressed out, and if we can handle a mission.

Bonnie's brother was deemed stressed and he had to take a stress test.  It took a bit, and cost more than a bit.  It was $3200 for a stress test.  Perhaps when the doctors see Bonnie, they will determine that living with me is certainly causing stress in her life and mandate that she has to take a stress test.  Then if for some reason iff I have to take a stress test also, it will cost another $3200.  Not fun, and may put off our mission until we can pay for that stress evaluation.  UGLY.

Then of course the dentist will verify if we are teeth that are falling out, decayed or even looking bad.  Don't know what a stress test would be involving the teeth, do you?  Maybe they will have us sing the Star Spangled Banner with marbles in our mouth to see if our diction works well and our teeth can handle it?  I don't know what a stress test would be for the mouth.  But you never know.  I had never heard of a stress test until Bonnie's brother told us about it.  Maybe there is such a thing for the mouth.

I have certainly identified that there seems to be a lack of connection from my brain to my mouth.  I think of one thing, say that thing and then I am told I did not say that thing.  For instance, the other day I was talking about doing some exercises to get my weight and heart in shape.  I said I needed to speed up my walking to get my heart moving and I said that I needed to strengthen my tongue to get my liver moving.  I knew I said it about my heart and weight but those who heard me heard something different.  Maybe I should worry about everyone else's ears, not that connection between my mind and mouth.

Anyway, we will find out if there is a stress test involving the mouth, what it costs, and whether it can tell what that connection I seem to be missing.  Maybe it is as simple as a fuse has blown somewhere in my mind or mouth.  All I would have to do is replace a "mouth" fuse?  Shouln't cost $3200.  I will let the dentist find that out.

Onward to preparing for our mission.

DAY 98 -- More and More Things To Miss

Filled out some more of the mission papers today.  It may take us 98 days to fill them all out.  Today they asked about immunizations.  I remember when I was (I really don't) about three years old I had this polio shot, or sugar cube, for they stopped giving shots. It was just the vaccine inside of a sugar cube.  Do they really want that date? What if I can't remember when I got all those sugar cubes?  Will they delay, or reject our papers? 

I sang one of my favorite songs today at a funeral. It was "Why We Sing" with our chorale.  We were invited to sing at the funeral for the deceased who was part of our chorale.  So we sang it, knowing that we probably would not sing that again, maybe never, I felt so sad leaving it behind, or upon the alter. 

It is going to continue to be hard to do things, sing things, see things, etc that will  have to take an 18 month to two year sabbatical.  No, no second thoughts, but it is going to be hard.  Last night I went to my sons house and we played that crazy game Risk with my three sons.  Of course I still lost.  What's new? But it was fun spending a night with the three of them, and two grand sons.  Yes, the grand sons also beat me.  But it was fun, and again it was another thing that I will have to forget, miss, and know that a mission is going to take the place of that. 

I can see why many "honored guests" (see yesterday) decline the opportunity to go on a mission.  There are many things that must be given up.  We will not change our mind, but it is going to be a challenge to leave so many people, and so many experiences, and so on and scuby doo and more.

But we are still so excited to be getting closer, even if we have to say goodbye and adios to many things.  That may even make the mission more special.  Have to wait and see.

DAY 99 -- Honored Guest I AM

It is amazing to me to realize that we have less than 100 days before we are going to be set to go.  We are filling out paper work.  The applications for senior missionaries have more than 50 pages to fill out.  By that time, we will have elbow cramp, finger cramp, and eye strain.  We will tell them how many steps we can climb, how long we can stand erect, how many fingers we can hold up at a time, and who the supreme court justices are, and who they were in 1927.

They are going to know which of my eyes are dominant, which one is blue and which one isn't.  They will know how many functioning disks I have in my back, and how many times I have had a cold, how many low notes I can hit when I have a cold and whether I can sing.  They will know what my record is in making a foul shot using my own basketball, and using a rubber one.

I am worried that they may find out that I cannot hear very well, that one ear hears better than the other one, and that my hair is no longer blond and has not been for quite some time.  They may even find out that I dyed my hair to get the jog I have now.  I guess that is why my boss hired me, thinking that I was much younger than I really am.  They may even find out that I am an honored guest.

It is interesting. Yesterday I went out to lunch with a friend.  They didn't ask if I get the senior discount.  They didn't ask how old I was. They just asked if I was an "HONORED GUEST."  I replied, "Of course I am."  They were referring to my age, but what a crazy way to ask.  Are many afraid or embarrassed, or insulted if someone asked how old someone is to give them a discount on their bill.  I am proud to be earning a discount, even if they don't as me if I am honored.

I wonder if they will have a "Double Honored" for those who get to be 90 or more.  I mean if I get one honored discount, those being older than 90 should get at least a double honored recognition, no?  Course if we called them double old, that may not be received too well I would surmise.  Maybe they could just tell them their meal was free if they were over 100 years old.  Nice how they treat us honored guests isn't it.

DAY 100 -- Small Event - Large Result

Whenever we desire something, we pray for it for a long period of time, often we hear, "It is in the Lord's time and it will happen "soon".  How true.  He is in charge.  His timing is perfect.  Our mission will come according to His timing.  My daughter, the one that was single longer than anyone else always hated hearing that statement.  She waited and waited.  Finally she found her intended and now has two kids.  But during the wait it was hard to keep hearing that.

Along with that statement is another of my favorites, "all things have been done in His wisdom."  Put those two together. When answers to prayers, husbands, and other things are delayed in their coming, perhaps it would be good to know that all things are in His hands and He knows when best to grant them.

Since we only have 100 days, I pause to look at small and simple things that have brought us here.  The move to Perry/Brigham City taught me many things about running a bowling alley, about people, about the economy, about management. It also brought about the "soon" for my single daughter.

The move away from Perry brought much debt, questions, and frustration.  It put us in a hole that we are digging out of.  It also allowed us to live with three of our children.  Each experience taught more lessons.  Father knows best. 

When we moved into this ward, through  the last two years it helped us see that a mission really was possible and that is why we are on the road we are on.  Just by moving into this ward.  By being unemployed for 18 months after the bowling alley, it has taught many lessons I have learned, many Eternal Lessons. 

So often "little" things happen that result in large, grand things.  But when those small, little things happen, often we do not see that they are the means, the seed of large things. 

I started working for a firm last March.  A small thing, at least my wage is small.  Starting to work there was just a means to help us along the road to our mission, getting out of debt and our preparation.  Through the last year, I have learned many things about myself, about people and what I can do from an insignificant position there.  Large things are in the process and may not ever happen, but there is the possibility to really make a difference in another government in Nigeria. 

Since I totally believe that Father is aware of where I am, is controlling things in my life, I know that when small things happen, seemingly insignificant, I need to remind myself that He knows what is happening and can see the end from the beginning.  I cannot so I walk by faith, accept all small things and watch Him nurture these little things into giant things.  Hindsight is great for seeing that.  We all have and will if we open our eyes and try to see with Eternal Perspective

DAY 101 -- Value of Goals and Monitoring them

It is a comfort to be on track.  We paused last June to set in operation our year long goal and progress toward it.  It is amazing that tomorrow I will be only 100 days away from that destination.  It is of comfort to know that we are keeping the original pace we set to be ready in many ways to serve Father. 


I can't help but continue to return to Elder Holland's advice when he directs, "We must take every opportunity to learn and to grow, to dream dreams and see visions, and work toward their realization."  This dream of realizing the goal of being missionaries is  rapidly coming toward us.  The first 250 days were days of thinking about it, planning it, and waiting.  It was a time of thinking that this and that is the last time we will experience that for a few years.  It was a passive time.

Now, with only one hundred days left, it is a time of action.  Most goals have a time of action.  I mean a real time of either do it or forget it.  We are almost daily talking about the "do it" phase.  As I said before, it is comfortable to have a goal, and work toward it daily, think about it, and take action toward it.  I don't know if I remember ever having a dream or goal such as this one and really working toward is as we are now. 

I remember so many goals of the past that were either never realized or were never written down, and actively pursue as this one.  So many go by the way and are forgotten.  Become a millionaire.  Climb Timpanogos Mountain.  Get a degree at the U.  Have lots of kids.  Get married.  Write a few books.  Lose myself in service full time.  Start this business and that business.  Touch and positively influence many people. Be a good husband and father, and even grand father. Continually learn and grow.

Along the line and through the years there were many goals, some realized and some not.  But I can now see how much good it is to write down the goal, keep it in front of you continually, set smaller goals to reach the larger goal, and continually consider it, work toward it, and monitor progress toward it. It has helped us get there.  Well, sort of "there" for we still have 100 days.  But it is coming.